Paying it Forward: A Last Minute Giveaway

Right now I’m at the outset of a cleaning metamorphosis.  After moving in last July we never got entirely settled which allowed a lot of clutter to build up.  Now I’m trying to kick it aside so that I can resume my “normal” life with a little less baggage.  I’ve started slowly so that I can gradually clean up our house without burning myself out (or ignoring my studying).  The first major task was cleaning off our kitchen table.  Throughout the wedding planning so much stuff began accumulating there that we often have a hard time sitting down to eat.  Extra mason jars were freecycled, wedding receipts were filed away in my wedding notebook (waiting for pictures from my photographer so that I can give you some final numbers), and unopened mail was trashed.  Then there were the stacks of bridal magazines and pages torn out of those magazines.  All of that was recycled.

And that reminded me that I have a few wedding books that I no longer need and am looking to GIVE AWAY:

For Richer, Not Poorer: The Newlyweds’ Financial Survival Guide by Deborah A. Wilburn

This book has all kinds of great advice on how to deal with finances with your new partner.  I highly recommend reading it BEFORE you get married, as it will help you to make your plans for after the wedding.

Intimate Weddings: Planning a Small Wedding that Fits Your Budget and Style

As you know, our wedding wasn’t exactly “intimate” with around 160 people.  Still, I found this book to have some great inspiration and ideas that I wanted to incorporate.

I’m headed to the post office TOMORROW and these books are going (if not to a reader, then to the thrift store)!  That means you should leave me a comment by 12PM tonight (and an e-mail to sanebride@gmail.com with your address) and I’ll announce a winner at 8 AM EST tomorrow.

Cleaning Up After the Wedding (AKA Wedding Stuff for Sale!)

For me, coming home after the wedding was probably the most stressful part of the weekend.  On our arrival we were welcomed to 2 weeks worth of laundry that we had been neglecting before the wedding, as well as the remnants of a million wedding projects and 6 ladies getting ready for the big night.

And then there was all of the wedding stuff…our little 600 square foot basement apartment was busting at the seams.  We began by taking back everything that we could possibly return.  This was KEY.  We purposefully over-purchased many of our supplies (like for assembling the flowers), so that we wouldn’t run out in the middle of a project.  Save every, single receipt.  Not only will it help you get a good idea of how much you spent, but it will also come in handy when you have 3 rolls of flower tape to return.

Then there are the things that can’t be returned, but which we really don’t need lying around our limited space.  We have turned to Craigslist and a variety of other websites to try to get rid of some of these things without throwing them away (I HATE throwing away usable stuff)!  Here’s that list:

20-120 inch white table cloths

20 white and navy damask table runners

1 cake stand

Place card holders

Table numbers and silver place cards

If you are interested in either the runners, table numbers, place cards, or place card holders please get in touch!  I have posted a few pictures below.  Unfortunately I don’t have any pictures of the place card holders, but I will post as soon as I do!

The Only Bad Thing

In all of the wedding planning I can honestly say that there is only one aspect in which we were disappointed.  As you may have recognized from some of my earlier posts our venue was a major source of stress for us.  I withheld a lot of information, but now that the day is over, I am ready to share it with you.

A new venue has both positives and negatives.  One of the positives should be the price, but unfortunately it didn’t come out that way for us after all was said and done.  In the end our wedding venue was beautiful but not without great expense and stress for us.  I’ll let you read the e-mail that we sent directly to the venue owner after the wedding, as well as the response that we received from him…

Hi Tom,

First of all we want to thank you for your help with the planing of our wedding. We think that what you are trying to do with Chatham Mills is admirable and we really love the building. We love that you are using the space not only for businesses but also carving out a space to preserve the arts in Pittsboro. The building has a great deal of charm and really is a wonderful place. That being said we both agree that if anyone asked if they should have their event at Chatham Mills we would have to say no. Here are some areas where we were less than pleased and some possible areas for improvement:

The heating situation goes without saying as being a BIG obstacle to using the main room. We signed a contract fully knowing that there was a possibility that heat would not be installed, but heating and air conditioning in an event space is the most basic of amenities. We were unfortunate that there happened to be a cold snap on our wedding night but we ended up paying over $600 dollars and borrowing your emergency heaters to not even adequately heat the large room.

The lighting and electrical situation in the large room is practically non existent. With what we were charged for the room it would have been much more appropriate to be able to walk in, flip a switch and have adequate light in the room to hold an event. It would be expected that any desired decorational lighting would be the responsibility of the person hosting the event but in the current state there is practically NO permanent lighting. The electrical situation in the large room is equally lacking. There is a single circuit running down each side of the room. This means that while there are 20+ physical plugs to use, the total amount of electricity that can be drawn is VERY limited. This resulted in us having to buy multiple 75+ foot extension cords to use the dedicated circuits that were installed on the back wall just to avoid tripping breakers. We were lucky enough to have some knowledge of the technical side of this and were able to avoid overloading the circuits by judiciously using lights and cords but it would have been very easy to have a very bad outcome.

The contract that we signed omitted several very important details. When we signed the contract we did not know that we would be responsible for paying a staff member for any and all time that we were in the venue.We did not know that we would have to arrange for and pay for a fire inspection. These are things that should be very clearly laid out in the contract.

While we only had two interactions with Stephanie, they ended up being very misleading. We were told that a lot of things would be “taken care of” that were not. We were also told that she would personally be there and that we wouldn’t be responsible for paying a staff member for access to the venue. She also offered her personal help in hiding some of the less attractive parts of the entrance like the “Carolina Dialysis” sign.

There were significant communication problems. There were several times when we called and left messages or sent emails and NEVER heard back. We think it is reasonable to expect emails to be responded to within 24-48 hours, especially if the emails are brief and asking very specific short answer questions. We requested a floor plan multiple times and only received one 4 days before the wedding. We were also promised the chandeliers only to find out 3 days before the wedding that we would have to rent them for $50, install them ourselves, and buy extension cords to power them.

Ultimately renting from Chatham Mills was very expensive for us. Here is a breakdown of what we spent:
$2300 for the rental
$600 to rent heaters
$200 payments to Johnny (not counting the payments that we would have owed for Sunday)
$75 for the fire inspector’s fees
$312 for insurance from the recommended insurance agent (we later found that online rates are half as expensive)
$100 for extension cords, lights for the small room, a broom handle (not decorations, but things that were necessary just to make the space usable)
$50 for chandeliers

Total: $3637

In retrospect taking into consideration the stress and the price tag of renting Chatham Mills we can’t honestly say we would be willing to go through it again if given the chance.

We hope that we have been able to articulate our concerns in a constructive way and hope that you can use our feedback to make Chatham Mills into the wonderful community gathering space that it has the potential to be.

Emily and Jordan

And the response we got…

Dear emily and Jordan,
Thank you for taking the time to give me your feedback concerning the space. I appreciate it very much and will be very helpful moving forward.
I would like to offer you the use of the event space for an event of your choosing, an anniversary, birthday etc. at no charge sometimes in the future.
Congratulations and many best wishes for a wonderful future.
Sincerely,
Tom

A bit of a slap in the face, wouldn’t you say?  Why would we ever want to use this place again knowing full and well that we would have to spend a full $1500 just to make it work.  Not to mention that we don’t plan on having another big party in the next few years.  And not an apology in sight.  I would have preferred a simple “I’m sorry” than that offer.  What do you think?

If I Had to Buy Another Wedding Dress…

I would immediately buy  this one.  So be-yoo-ti-ful!  And only $395!

h

And Some Professional Ones Too…

Have I told you how much I love our photographer?  Months ago Evan Pike won Jordan and me over with his sincerity and gentleness.  This morning I was lucky enough to wake up to an e-mail in my inbox telling me that he has posted a few photos to his blog.  Here are just 2 of my favorites, but be sure to go to Evan’s website to see the others!

(Which reminds me of another big surprise.  My little cousin did quite the interpretive reading at our wedding…more on this later!)

The Biggest Surprises of the Wedding

5. Being incredibly sick the day of the rehearsal.  As in vomiting until 2 PM sick.

4.  The flowers.  The bridesmaids and I did an amazing job, if I do say so myself.

3. The weather.  Highs in the low thirties in NC are NOT typical of NC.  Ever.

2. How amazing I felt in my dress.  For some reason I felt cheated of the whole “wedding dress experience” because I bought my dress on Ebay for $125.  But man, I felt GOOD in it.

1. That I had so much fun.  I did ZERO stressing the day of the wedding.  And I am a girl that stresses.  Wedding zen really does exist!

A Sneak Peek

Some of my friends have already put up photos from the wedding which I just couldn’t wait to post!  They are actually in reverse order.

I don’t know what was going on here, but for some reason I like this photo anyway…

This is how we roll…

You Can Call Me Mrs. Sanebride

I am married!  And it was fabulous!  I can’t even describe how wonderful the day was.  In fact it was a million times better than I could have ever dreamed.

I cannot wait to get photos so that I can share them with you!

This Chick Is Getting Married!

I can’t wait to tell you everything!  So far everything has been really, really wonderful.  Thank you so much for your support through all of this!

The Last Few Days

The week before a wedding is CRAZY BUSY.  I had great plans of blogging every day so that you could see our progress as we are finally able to spend all of our time working on wedding stuff.  I’ll just say that I haven’t had time.  Lo siento.

Everything has been going pretty smoothly though.  And the weather is going to hold up, I do believe.  I can’t wait to tell you more after the big day has come and gone.